sex ed with my grandma

Mornings after I drop off Brianna, I sit at my desk have some coffee, check my email and call my grandma. We had an interesting conversation today. This was, as always, in Spanish, but translating will really not have you lose anything.

right out of nowhere . . . .

grandma: Mija, what's the karma satra?
me (after nearly spitting out my coffee): You mean the kama sutra?
grandma: Yes, that one. What is it?
me: uh, . . it's like a book. . . of like. . uh. . (trying to find a way to explain here and wondering where this is going)
grandma: Oh! So, it's true! Is it like about sex?
me: yes

-let me explain here that my grandma loves Spanish celebrity gossip. There is an infamous actor known for his philandering ways who claimed something about being better than the kama sutra-

grandma: Well, supposedly Andres Garcia brags about being better than that Kama whatever and that's how I knew I was wrong
me: wrong about what?
grandma: about what it was. I thought kama sutra was something like kung fu
me: Bwah, ha, ha, ha! Hopefully you didn't confuse those two things with my grandpa.
grandma: (laughing pretty hard) Ay, mija!

The rest of the conversation was hilarious, and even though there's no way my grandma would ever know, I'll keep the rest private. She did after all end up saying God and Jesus phrases. Válgame Dios!

feeling: I'm still laughing
listening to: Incubus (Talk Shows on Mute)